Less Than Three Weeks Til Baby

I can't even tell you how nice the last three weeks of my Mom Sabbatical have been. While I haven't exactly been lounging poolside and eating bonbons the whole time, I have enjoyed more "me time" than I've had since my single years. Hours at home, by myself, to get things done, take a nap when I need to, go out shopping, catch up on my soap, etc.

And still, lots more leisure time with my girl, just the two of us. We are rarely rushed, so we can feel free to hang out in one of her beloved indoor tents, sing verse after verse of "This Old Man" and play at the park. No deadline or timeclock to worry me. The only thing holding me back is this giant belly I'm carrying around (and the ungodly heat, which fortunately let up this week!)

I doubt most men would understand this, but I know plenty of women do: I feel better mentally now that my house is getting in order. It was such a disaster before my Mom Sabbatical, because I had neglected it for so long, barely keeping my head above water between work and parenthood. Seeing my home in the state it was in became a constant source of stress for me. Finally, it's starting to become the house I want. Orderly closets. Steam-cleaned carpets. A yard I can be proud of (the landscapers arrived for their first day of work yesterday). Unwanted things on their way to Salvation Army.

Give me another couple of weeks (please, Baby Boy!) and I think I can really have this place in good enough shape to give you a virtual tour. I want it to look and feel nice when we get home from the hospital with our son. Then I can spend the remainder of my leave caring for him and Cassie, enjoying our expanded family.

P.S. If you're not a regular viewer of Clean House on the Style Network, you might want to tune in Wednesday at 9 p.m. for a two-hour "Messiest Home in the Country" special. Featuring a home from our very own Cincinnati! Sounds like it'll be a real doozy of an episode (and definitely will make me feel better about my own house -- it's not that bad!)

Mommy Amnesia

The other night I went to Babies "R" Us to pick out a baby shower gift for my friend who is having her first child. I was looking forward to the trip since it's always fun to find a gift that you hope will get the biggest "ahhh!" at party. What I found is... I've sure forgotten about a lot!

As soon as you walk into BRU you're bombarded with baby gizmos and gadgets galore. I found myself looking at items and thinking they seemed familiar, possibly something that I had coveted once before, but no longer have in my possession. What that's for? Did I ever use one of these?

Then there were the pregnant ladies, looking very intense as they carefully scanned bar-codes with their registry zappers. I witnessed one expecting mama go off on a store employee. Something about a stroller she wanted to exchange. I stood there gawking for a moment. Then quickly walked away before she'd rip out my eyeballs. Wow, I thought... Did I ever act like that?

Mommy amnesia.

I know I've been there, done that. But, a lot of it I don't recall. Maybe I've suppressed those memories way down deep. With kids ages 4 and 6, my thoughts are elsewhere.

Sometimes I'll feel like the odd man out if I'm with pregnant women or women with babies. Conversations will turn to labor stories, feeding tactics, or dirty diapers. They'll ask me about my experiences and I'll blank out. I don't remember how much son weighed when he was born. I can't remember when daughter switched to solid foods. I'm an idiot.

Do you suffer from mommy amnesia at all?

Friday Finds - June 26, 2009

Cara's Finds

-- Win a big reimbursement on BlogHer '09. The brands of Johnson & Johnson wants to pay for the expenses for 20 BlogHer attendees. If you're already registered to attend the conference, sign up for a chance to win $1,200 cash. The sweepstakes ends July 7. Good luck!

--Red, Pink, and Blue event in Cincy. CincyChic is painting the town red, pink, and blue with a health awareness event with a fashionable twist. Through Sunday there will be lunch 'n learns, health screenings, pampering, and--of course--a lot of fashion and fun. All-day passes can be purchased online for just $15.

Susan's Finds

-- Need a caregiver to help you out this summer? Care.com is offering a 50% summer discount for new members. Benefits include access to hundreds of thousands of caregivers nationwide, unlimited background checks of caregivers, and last-minute care options through Care-on-Call.

-- Create a cool kiwifruit recipe and you could win $2,500. Zespri Kiwifruit is launching a contest from now through Aug. 7 for the best "kiwi for lunch" recipe." Blog it, tell them about it and get entered to win.

Tasty Tuesday

Tela here--filling in for Sara--and wanting to share with you the steps I've taken this past year to help me get a decent dinner on the table after a long day of work/daycare shuffling/whatever.

First up I wanted to share that I have started MENU PLANNING (!!). Nothing crazy, simply ideas for dinners written on a piece of paper and magneted (new word!) to the fridge. So "Mon--Chicken Feta Pasta with Spinach; Tues--Jambalaya."

I shop according to the meal ingredients, and it actually helps me save some time and money. Instead of wandering aimlessly through the aisles, I shop with a purpose, people.

I don't always follow my menu exactly, and I'll switch meals around (shuffle Tuesday and Friday), depending on my mood and what I feel like cooking and/or eating. I also make sure to include some really easy meals like homemade pizza or taco casserole (see below) for days I just don't have it in me to cook a bigger meal or when O seems especially hungry.

I usually scoff at any sort of organization or planning in my life--because I'm just.not.good.at.it. I tend to lack follow-through. But I have to admit, it does make my life easier.

And since a Tasty Tuesday wouldn't be very tasty without a recipe, here's one for Taco Casserole, although it actually might be more like a pie. Hmm... Casserpie?

Taco Casserpie

What You'll Need:
1 lb lean ground beef
Refried Beans
1 jar salsa
1 can corn (if you want)
Flour Tortillas
Cheddar, Mont Jack, or Cheddar Jack Cheese (whichever is your favorite)
Tortilla/Corn Chips
Scallions

What to Do:
Brown and drain your ground beef.
Toss in half the salsa and the corn. Cook till warmed.
In a bowl, combine the refried beans and rest of salsa. (May need to nuke the beans for a minute.)
Spray a round baking dish with non-stick spray and toss in a tortilla.
Alternate layers of beef and bean mixture, separated by tortillas.
Top with crushed corn chips, cheese, and scallions.
Cook at 350 for about a half hour or so. Until cheese is melted, but don't burn the chips.

Friday Finds - June 19, 2009

Susan's Finds

-- Is the same-old same-old getting a little, well, old with the kiddos? My friend/Cassie's sitter Karen directed me to this awesome site/blog/downloadable Book of Days from Blue Yonder Ranch, chock-full of new activities and ideas to try with children. They're educational, creative and fun, all at the same time. A lot of them seem more relevant to school-age kids, but many ideas could be adapted to fit your preschooler's/toddler's needs.

-- If you're at all into the green movement, you've probably heard of Ideal Bite, a daily e-newsletter with tips about how to buy and live "greener." Now they have a newsletter especially with moms in mind, called Mama Bite. I've been getting it for a few days now and it's got some good stuff. If you sign up by the end of June, you'll also be entered to win a family vacation for four to Walt Disney World® Resort. Suh-weeet! I know we could use a free vaca this summer.

-- Breastfeeding while working is hard. I didn't do it myself, but I know lots of moms who have. At least your work clothes could make it a little easier on you, right? Enter HadleyStillwell, a new line of well-tailored clothing just for nursing/pumping women. About time, eh? The collection includes a signature dress, jacket, sleeveless crossover shirt and long-sleeved crossover shirt. Cute stuff!

-- Another fun freebie activity for your kids this summer: Cartoon Network's Get Animated Tour. Now in its fifth year, this 40-city tour is designed to motivate, energize and educate kids ages 6-14 about healthy living choices by using the power of Cartoon Network’s shows, characters and brands.

The tour will run all summer and feature interactive areas designed around select Cartoon Network series as well as activity areas for kids, including: the Crayola “Everything Imaginable” tent featuring three different Crayola activity stations; an FDA (Food and Drug Administration) area where kids will toss over-sized “nutrition label” dice and compare the two face-up labels for a prize, while learning to understand the nutrition facts label on food packaging more effectively; and a Subway section where kids will have the opportunity to compete on stationary bikes with a video game to beat a countdown clock.

Cincy folks: The tour's coming to the Nati July 25 at Coney Island.

The Secret to a Long Marriage

This past weekend, we celebrated my parents' 40th wedding anniversary.

Do a little math, and you'll realize they were married in the summer of '69, man. Like when Woodstock was raging. And Bryan Adams was rockin' out in his garage and kissing his girlfriend on the porch. Of course, my folks were doing no such raging or rockin' out. They were recent college grads, very practical and responsible, and definitely NOT hippies. (This always disappointed me, but what can you do?)

When we were sitting outside in my brother's backyard after a celebratory dinner, enjoying the fruits of their labor (i.e., watching their four grandchildren playing), I asked them how they managed to stay together for so long in a time when half of all couples don't.

Mom said it was due to their unfailing commitment to staying together, as well as a constant willingness to compromise -- on both sides. "You'll resent it if you're the one compromising and the other person isn't," she said.

Dad added that from the very beginning, they agreed not to end a date (or a day, once they were married) mad at each other. They tried to work out whatever argument or issue they had quickly, rather than let it fester.

Hmm. Well, I don't see a bestselling book coming out of this discussion. Nothing earth-shattering about their "secret." But it reminded me that successful, long-term marriage is like any other lasting, worthwhile success in life. You have to just keep on keeping on, even when it's hard. And be flexible, because the world around us is constantly changing. You could apply that to lots of things: weight loss, parenting, work.

And if you do it as well as my parents have all these years with each other, you just might have something worth talking about in 40 years.

Can't We All Just Get Along?

When I found out my first child would be a girl, I felt joy mixed with fear. Why fear? Because I remember how hard it was being a girl, especially when I had to deal with other girls. Girls can be mean. Girls can leave lasting scars on one another. I am still working through some of those scars, which could be a reason why I now write young adult novels.

I was prepared to deal with Mean Girls in ten years, give or take a few. So imagine my horror to find that the mean-ness starts in preschool. For the past two years, my little one has come home with stories about how, "so and so says she won't be my friend if I can't snap my fingers" and "so and so said my lunchbox is stupid" and "so and so says she doesn't like me and wouldn't play with me at recess."

Even more horrifying? Little One is also dishing out the mean. I've seen it with my own two eyes. And no matter what I do to model and encourage and even, at times, force friendly behavior, it doesn't seem to stick.

Here's what's triply horrifying: Little boys are mean, too. In fact, some of the most blatant mean-ness that I have seen has come from boys. Little guys on the playground make a game out of running away from my daughter. One little boy actually hit her in the face. Even her best little boy friend has been known to yell at her and tell her he doesn't like/want to play with her. And guess what? She does the same to him.

It's gotten to the point where I watch those PBS kid shows where all the kids share and play nicely together, and I wonder what planet they live on. Adults like to wax poetic about how kind children are at heart, but I think those adults are full of it. From what I have seen, a child's first instinct isn't kindness, it's cruelty. Forget Barney, it's Lord of the Flies out there, people. These days, when we meet children on the playground who are friendly and play nicely and include everybody, I am actually shocked.

What is a parent to do?!

I've discussed it with my daughter's preschool teachers, and I know they do all they can to foster a positive environment. But this behavior almost seems hard-wired into kids. My husband and I have called children out on the playground for getting physical with our daughter, only to catch it from the parents, many of whom seem to think kids should be allowed to "fight it out."

Well, I disagree. Kids shouldn't be forced to play with each other if they don't want to, but neither should they be blatantly excluding or even picking on others. And if my daughter were hitting other children or making them feel bad or left out, then I would *hope* somebody would let me know. I can guarantee you that I would be all over my child like white on rice. I try to stay on top of her behavior, teach her empathy and manners, and bring down the consequences if I see her being cruel.

But some days, it just doesn't seem to sink in.

Fellow WMAGs, have you experienced what I'm experiencing? How do you deal with it? Should I just gird my loins and expect to be dealing with this for the next 20 years until my daughters are out of the house? Why can't we all just get along?!

Friday Finds - June 12, 2009

Cara's Finds

-- Be the match. Join the National Bone Marrow Donor registry and you could help save the life of one of the thousands of patients with life-threatening diseases who are still waiting for a match. Look for the Be The Match "Marrowthon" in your city now through June 22. Joining the registry usually costs money to cover tissue typing expenses, but during the Marrowthon it's free. In Cincinnati, it's taking place at the Hoxworth Blood Center on Weds., June 10 from noon to 5:00 p.m. All it takes is some paperwork and a quick swab of the inside of your cheek. Or you can go online and have a kit sent to you.

--Super WHY! event at Toys "R" Us. If you're looking for something to do on Saturday, visit Toys "R" Us for a super Super WHY! event to celebrate the launch of the new toy line. From noon to 2:00 p.m. stop by for story-tellings, games, activities, and a complimentary gift.

--Stop. Hammertime! Have you seen the new promo for Hammertime, A&E's new series on M.C. Hammer? It makes me want to jump up and join in.