Knowing some of what my friend Susan Brown has gone through with her son JT (along with her husband Aaron and their younger daughter Caitlin), I thought it might be nice to have her share her experience with you. Here’s her story. — Susan

Since my birthday is May 1st, I have always had something to celebrate during the month of May.

On May 5, 2007, my husband, Aaron, co-hosted a Cinco de Mayo Surprise Party to celebrate to my 30th birthday.

Eight days later, I celebrated my first Mother’s Day when my son, JT, was 6 months old.

On May 28, Aaron, JT and I moved from our Cape Cod in the city (Oakley) to our colonial in the suburbs (West Chester).

On May 31, the month-long celebration was over. As I sat with JT at the pediatrician’s office, I tried to explain to the doctor that something was wrong with JT’s right arm. I didn’t think his arm was broken, but I knew it wasn’t right. If his pacifier was next to his right hand, he would reach across his body and pick it up with this left hand. His right hand was in a fist more than his left hand. When he rolled to the left side, his right arm would get stuck.

The doctor gave us three referrals and we spent June and July of 2007 at various appointments: occupational therapy (OT) evaluation, physical therapy (PT) evaluation and neurology. We started Early Intervention/Help Me Grow services through our county and attend weekly OT and PT appointments.

In July, we attended an appointment at the Brachial Plexus Clinic at Cincinnati Children’s Hospital. My husband and I were hoping we would get some answers at this appointment, and we did. We were both shocked when the doctor told us that she suspected that JT had a stroke.

On July 20, the doctor’s suspicions were confirmed when an MRI revealed that JT had suffered massive a left hemisphere in utero stroke.

The last five years have definitely been a journey. We have been so fortunate to meet so many caring individuals on the way–occupational therapists, physical therapists, speech-language pathologists, doctors, teachers and teaching assistants–that have had a profound impact on JT’s life. We are so proud of JT’s determination and perseverance.

We now have some thing new to celebrate during the month of May: May is Pediatric Stroke Awareness Month.

–Susan Brown

Childhood stroke occurs in approximately 1 in 2,700 infants and 11 in 100,000 children (ages 1 month to 19 years) each year. Children frequently have significant long-term disabilities after a perinatal stroke, including cognitive and sensory impairments, epilepsy, visual and behavioral difficulties, and cerebral palsy. Early identification and treatment is key to success for little stroke survivors.

How can you help?
Volunteer, Donate, Advocate: The Children’s Hemiplegia and Stroke Association, is a 501(c)(3) non-profit organization, dedicated to improving the quality of life for children and families affected by infant and childhood stroke.

Picture this:  Large bowl of sliced strawberries in hand.  Standing on the landing.  Step down with the right foot – which slides.  Left foot gets caught on the landing.  Strawberries fly everywhere and so do I!  One kid runs for a bag of frozen berries to put on my knee while the other rushes to clean up the mess that now lay all over the carpeted stairs.  Me – well, after letting a few words escape my mouth that never should have, I sit with a bag of berries on my knee while someone else begins a much less exciting meal.

Not only was the missing meal a disappointment, but when you work so hard in the gym, you could only hope that any injuries could be explained by “I over did it working out”.  But not me!

Orthopedic doctor: “So, let me guess.  You over did it in the gym?”
Me (head down): “I fell down the stairs.”

Me to personal trainer: “I can’t make it in to the appointment.  I am on crutches now.”
Personal trainer: “Did you do too much working out?”
Me (head down with a sign): “I fell down the stairs.”

Then, while being confined to bed or crutches, I lay in bed to see a small hole develop in my bedroom ceiling while squirrel nose and whiskers peek through! YOWSA!  I could only envision that thing jumping down and attacking me like a rabid animal while I am stuck in bed! hahahaha  Screaming, one of the kids ran up to put duct tape over the hole until I could get someone in to get the squirrels out of the attic – where they apparently had made their home!

Needless to say, cooking the healthy meals the past week hasn’t gone the greatest.  Kids have been helping, but now I feel bad because everyone’s healthy routine got interrupted.

On the bright side, if I was on reality TV, I think I would be a great comedy to watch! hahaha

Hope everyone else’s week went much better!

• Hubs considers most vegan dishes to be inedible (with some exceptions).
• Kids are picky as hell and whine about anything that’s not fast food or processed. (And sometimes, they whine about those, too.)
• I started a new full-time job with a long-ass commute. The fam doesn’t exactly like to wait until I get home at 6:45 for me to fix them dinner. And I don’t exactly feel like cooking it, either!
• Trips to the grocery store have been fewer and farther between. There may be tumbleweeds blowing in my fridge–I’m not sure.

So what’s a plant-seeker to do? I’m looking for any shortcut to natural, healthy eating I can find.

Recently, I discovered a good one: organic, natural produce and groceries, delivered to your door! Awesome, right?

Green B.E.A.N. Delivery currently serves the fine midwestern communities of Cincinnati, Columbus, Dayton and Indianapolis.  Their online service provides fresh produce and groceries through its network of local farmers and artisans. I became an instant fan of this healthy alternative to conventional grocery stores.

I received a complimentary small produce bin (valued at $35) to try their service, and was blown away by all the fruits and veggies I got. Fingerling potatoes, ruby red cherry tomatoes, gorgeous bibb lettuce, and lots more – yum! For the next week or so, my family enjoyed the bounty of nature from that green bin.

And it saved me a trip to the store. Major bonus.

I like that you aren’t just limited to produce with Green B.E.A.N. They also offer all-natural and organic groceries including local dairy, eggs, meats, bread, bulk kitchen staples, artisan foods and more.

If you’re in the Green B.E.A.N. service area, and want to try out this shortcut, here’s a super-special code* to save 50% off your first produce bin: WMAGdpc

* Does not apply to any grocery items added to your first order. Code expires 5/14/12, and is for new members and reactivations only.

Have you discovered any great little secrets that make it easier to healthy as a family? Please, for the love of plants, share.

This is me. Every night after I get home from work, eat a microwaved frozen dinner, and hug my kids.

Why am I so tired? It’s not like I’m doing physical labor. I write copy and think of stuff.

I get a decent amount of sleep each night.

But I just have no energy to clean the house or being super mom.

Blergh. I need to get my mojo back, people!

The first thing I appreciated about Red Envelope was their great selection of unique Mother’s Day gifts. From gorgeous. personalized jewelry to flowers, picture frames and gourmet treats, the items are classy, sensitively selected and really beautiful. I ended up getting my mother the Languages of Mom necklace.

Ordering from Red Envelope was simple, too, but what I really liked was how quickly my item arrived. My mother’s in town right now, helping with the kids while I travel for work, and the necklace arrived right when I’d requested it. So I got to give it to her in person. And did I mention that she loves it? It’s a beautiful piece–really nice quality and well worth the money. It’s probably one of the nicest Mother’s Day gifts I’ve ever given.

If you’re busy like me, if Mother’s Day snuck up on you and you’re still looking for unique gifts for Mom, I’d definitely recommend checking out Red Envelope.

(Mom, have you averted your eyes?)

(For real? OK then.)

So, Mother’s Day. I’m not the best at it. I usually forget until the very last minute, and my mom ends up with card if she’s lucky. Which she probably isn’t, because she has a daughter that sucks at Mother’s Day. DON’T JUDGE ME PEOPLE, I AM A BUSY WORKING MOM WHO LIVES IN ANOTHER CITY. AND REMEMBER? WE’RE AGAINST GUILT HERE.

The last couple of years I’ve locked it up good. I’ve remembered, and I got her different flowers and plants, which she seems to love. (Or she’s just being really nice, which wouldn’t surprise me, because she IS really nice.) One year I got her a beautiful gardenia, and I think it’s even still living. So this year, when Pro Flowers offered me the opportunity to pick from their Mother’s Day gift ideas with a $50 credit, I jumped at the chance.

At first, I was overwhelmed by the selection. There is just so, so much to choose from. So what did I do? I asked my son to pick out an arrangement. I’m not going to link to it here, because I have a feeling my mom IS ACTUALLY READING THIS. And I don’t want to spoil the surprise. I will say that he picked it because it was colorful and the flowers looked “snappish.” And snappish means that they would SNAP you. So like snapdragons, but not. But don’t worry, Mom. They are pretty, and they won’t snap you. (Why are you still reading?!)

A really cool function of the site, I thought, was their “back” browsing ability. Once you added something to your card, you could pick where you wanted to start shopping from again. Maybe I’m just out-of-date in my online shopping, but that was a cool feature I appreciated. Also, if you are flexible on your shipping dates (which I was) you could save some cold hard cash.

Check them out if you’re looking for some gift ideas for mom. I’m sure you’ll find something you like.

(** Full disclosure: PersonalCreations.com did supply me with a gift of a $50 credit to use on their site.)

I fell in love with things for myself as well!  I have always wanted a mother’s ring or necklace and they had quite a few!  (I will have to go back and order one of those.) I settled on ordering a Mother’s Day Square Spa Basket to be shipped to her and personalized it with “Grandma” on the front of it.

The selection on the site was very nice.  I really liked the option of creating shirts and coffee mugs with the family characters (including names).  But, I think one of the neatest gifts was the Family Canvas that looked like a painted tree.  The leaves had the names provided painted on them and the family name was at the bottom of the canvas.  If you haven’t found a Mother’s Day gift yet, you should hop on over to check it out!

What do you usually give for Mother’s Day?  Do you have a favorite place to shop for the holiday? What do you like to receive for Mother’s Day?  What was your best/worst gift you ever got?

This past weekend, I stumbled across the Super Healthy Kids website and signed up.  A few tweaks and lots of grocery shopping later, we were prepared to jump in.  I have been pleasantly surprised that the meals this week have gotten a constant stamp of approval from my kids!  Woot!  So, if you are trying to figure out how to get kids to eat healthy but struggle with regular meals to put together for them, you have to check the site out!  (April-23-29-Meal-Plan)

What has also been a plus about it is that my kids have all wanted to pitch in and help make the meals.  I put everything together in a binder that I leave on the kitchen counter.  The kids check the binder before they eat anything to see what they should be eating for that time of day.  The majority of the time, when I am in chopping things up to cook, at least one kid wanders in and begins helping with other pieces of what is being made.  This morning, I was making apple cinnamon muffins for breakfast and my son wandered in saying “can I help make something?”.  So he knocked out making the english muffin pizzas that would be packed in lunches.  It’s been really nice to cook with them AND to hear they like all the food!

We also have been at the gym every single day.  We picked up a membership for Life Time Fitness up in Mason.  What a fabulous gym!  I am very happy with the choice we made!  The older kids have made it to the gym on the days they are available.  Kylie and I have become a team.  I really am beginning to cherish the moments with her – doing the bikes or the treadmill together or whatever we choose for the day.  We met with a personal trainer yesterday so that we can work on developing a plan we can both do together – her with her needs and mine with my limitations.

With all of this new stuff going on, my free time has been limited, but the family time together has been really awesome!  My day starts with cooking 6am-7am while getting my daughter ready to head off to school.  Then I get ready and head to work.  After work, I come home to cook dinner, eat dinner, then pack up for the gym.  We usually are at the gym 7:30pm-9pm.  Then, we make it home in time to do last minute things and head to bed to start over again.

Knowing all of this, while driving to work today, this blog was on my mind.  ”Working Moms Against Guilt”  How can I possibly feel guilty when I am getting to do such great things with my kids while teaching them a healthy way of living?  I don’t!  Not for one second!  During the day, they are doing their thing (school/work) and I am doing mine (work) – but we start the day off together and finish it together as well.  Everyone is healthy, happy and pitching in to work together.  Don’t get me wrong – I can completely understand how a mom struggles with guilt, but I am making the choice to live a balanced life that benefits everyone  so there is nothing for me to feel guilty about right now.  Woot!  Loving it!

Career Family Balance

Well, I have recovered from the turmoil of having to find a new job.  I am happily employed at a new company that brings new challenges.  What started as a stressful and depressing situation has morphed into great changes for my family!  First – thank you to everyone that offered tips and advice!  You were all on point and my current position came from exactly the types of things that were suggested.

So, while I wasn’t ready to change, I guess there was a plan in place I didn’t know about for my family that would be even better for all of us.  The position I landed came with a very small decrease in pay, but the extras seemed attractive to me so I took it.  What I didn’t realize is how it would offer benefits for my family that I hadn’t thought about.

My new employment is located less than 15 minutes from my home.  Can I tell you how absolutely wonderful it is to be home no later than 5pm every single day?!?!  I never realized how much time the drive to and from downtown cost me in time with my family.  Not only do I save money in gas (making up for the decrease in pay), but I get AT LEAST an extra 1.5 hours of time with my children every day!  I had never thought about how the travel time for work impacted my family.  I had always looked at it as a necessary part of having a job.  But, in reality, it robs you from the time you can be spending with your children.  So, my first piece of advice for any mom that wishes they had more time with their kids – evaluate your travel time.

The next plus – my daughter’s school is only 5 minutes away from my job!  She has been begging me to have lunch with her at school, but working downtown, I knew that was very difficult to arrange.  Now, I can easily make it part of my lunch break and surprise her with extra time together.  So – if you do get in a place you need to consider a new job, consider where your children are during work hours.  Are there possibilities close to give you the extra time with them?

During this time, my oldest son moved back home – so all four of my children are together again.  Most moms would probably think that at 24, 21, 18 and 12 – that they would have most of their children out of the house or ready to move out and be making plans.  Honestly, our family is close and we really actually like spending time together.  But also, I want my children to have advantages in life.  I have talked to them about steps they should go through to start off the right way into adulthood:

• how to get their college done with the least amount of student loans
• how to pay them off before moving out
• how to purchase things they will need for their future place little at a time so when they are ready to move out, they have what they need
• how to buy the things they want while they can so when they finally leap out of the home, they can do so with a college education, no student loans, a nice car, a nice job and all they need to set up a nice home for themselves

The oldest two have been accepted to college and are working.  The third oldest graduates next month, will apply for college and is just now finishing up her manager training for the place she has worked since she turned 16.  The youngest is learning lessons watching the steps.  But with all of the busy-ness that happens in the home, it has become harder for us to have our family dinners together.  So we have started to do dinner dates!  Getting home from work earlier has allowed me the chance to do this easier.  Some nights it may be just the boys.  Some nights just the girls.  Some nights everyone and some nights maybe just one.  It’s been wonderful!  By going out to eat for these, it forces everyone to stop what they are doing and just focus on each other.  We talk, laugh, try new foods and really have a great time reconnecting with each other.  I didn’t realize that by rushing dinner – even if it was at home and with everyone, we were still rushing through dinner to get onto other things.  This has made us all slow down and focus on the time we are together.  We haven’t smiled and laughed as much together for a really long time.

One other change comes from the fact that my oldest son has been a vegetarian for several years now.  My youngest daughter has been wanting to get involved in sports and losing some weight.  My oldest daughter joined a gym.  So taking another look at our lifestyle has come into play.  Now that we are spending more time together and we have some common interests in getting healthy, we are putting things in place to do that as a family.  This weekend, I will be checking out the gym that my daughter joined.  It allows 12 year olds to workout using the equipment and has many benefits.  My oldest daughter and my oldest son are already members.  This will allow the family to workout together.  What a great way to connect!  Joining a gym, we get to spend time together and work towards a goal all in one!

I also came across a great site:  Super Healthy Meal Plans (you have to check this out!!)  OMG!! Talk about amazing!!!  This site has fabulous meal plans including the shopping lists and recipes all conveniently available weekly that are healthy and kid friendly!  They look amazing and I know my kids will eat tons of what are on there!  They also have lesson plans for kids and really cute additional tools to help kids learn about being healthy and making wise choices.  I am printing these items out and putting them in a binder.  I am cleaning out the fridge, throwing tons of things away, replacing the food  to match these meal plans and we are off!  Soooooo super excited about this!!  Teaching my kids about healthy eating and learning about new food options – woot!

And one more thing – but this one is for me – the new job has given me the chance to work with women in technology.  I have been a woman in technology for 16 years now.  It’s been a male-dominated field that entire time.  I found myself working with mostly men – which wasn’t horrible, but it always would have been nice to have someone around that could relate to what I was dealing with.  I didn’t know this new job would come with this benefit at all.  When I got assigned to my client, I walked in to find several women in the positions to do the same tech-heavy work that I would be doing.  Hallelujah!  I could almost hear the bells and angels sing! Hahaha It has been so awesome to be able to talk about technology to women that understand it and love it like I do.  They have ran into the same issues in the male dominated field that I have.  They have similar interests that I have.  Wow!  Talk about a HUGE relief that I didn’t even know existed!  Technology can be stressful in itself – but add to it the struggles that come with constantly having to prove yourself because you are a woman in the field and the struggle of men not understanding how women think – geez Louise!  This has been such a wonderful added plus and stress reliever in my life!  So, find a job doing what you love, but also, with similar types of people as yourself for a better work environment.

The loss of my job – it was devastating.  The move to this new job – has brought so many wonderful changes that I never dreamed would come from it.  This just is a simple reminder to those women that do feel down about their situation with their job and their family time – take a look at what your normal is and consider, are there better normals available?  Are there options to allow you to continue to work (if that is what is right for you) but improve what you already have?  From someone who had never thought of the little things that affect the family, changes in even the little things can bring great rewards!

I guess the timing was right for the Mommy Wars to rear its tired, ugly head.

In case you slept through last week, here’s a recap: Mitt Romney made some remarks to the effect that his wife gives him advice on economic issues of importance to women. Democratic strategist Hilary Rosen, while making a bigger point about the fact that Romney’s wife’s economic situation is not typical of most women’s, uttered the unfortunate pronouncement that Ann Romney, a stay-at-home mom, had never worked a day in her life.

Cue all of the outrage you’d expect from all of the typical quarters. Cue the articles and newscasts pitting moms who work outside the home against those who stay home. By now, most of us can write the script. And most of the women I know – both working moms and stay-at-home moms – have been like, “Really?! This again?” Because, in reality, NONE OF US IS AT WAR! I respect my SAHM friends, and they respect me. We realize we are facing bigger problems that threaten all of us–problems like an economy that has millions of families just a lay-off away from disaster, whether the main breadwinner is Mommy or Daddy.

I think we all understand that both Ann Romney and Michelle Obama are in different situations than most of us when they make choices about whether and where to work. Neither of them has to worry too much about who will bring home the bacon if they don’t. I, frankly, am dreading spending the next 6 to 7 months listening to their husbands try and convince me that they get “women’s issues.” I’d much rather they convince me that they get the bigger issues and are willing to look beyond their own partisan BS to actually get something accomplished.

But if women HAVE to be a political football, then here’s what would make a difference to me: I want to see each candidate create an advisory board made up of moms from all walks of life. I want to know that they’re talking to the mom who has to work because her husband is underemployed, to the mom who has made the courageous decision to stay home and make ends meet on a single salary — the one who constantly what will happen if that salary one day is no longer there. I want to know that the candidates have consulted moms who are proud of their careers and their successful children. And it would really impress me if they talked to moms who didn’t necessarily subscribe to their party’s dogma.

I want the candidates to listen–really listen to those moms. I want them to shape their views and agendas based on what they hear, not on what pundits and pollsters tell them. And then, I want them to play nice. It’s what any mom, stay-at-home or working, would tell them to do.