Working Moms Against Guilt

Well, Hello There, Blog. It’s Been a While.

Susan — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 19:32:31 +0000

I have been MIA from this blog for a few months. Why’s that, Susan? you’re probably (not) asking yourself.

I guess it’s the same old blah-blah — consumed by other priorities, like work, family, the usual. But I sure have thought about writing. Post ideas and blog improvements constantly fly into my head, and then they fly right out again as I trudge ahead to some other “more important” thing, like getting the dishes put away or my kids put to bed.

What I’d most like to share with our longtime readers today is my latest attempt to get healthy and lose weight.

Time for a change

Back in November, I got pretty freaked out when I stepped on the scale for the first time in ages. The number was the highest I had ever seen when weighing myself. And the only reason I mustered the courage to get on in the first place? Excruciating lower back pain that rendered me immobile and blubbering like a baby to my mama. I knew I had to change how I was treating my body.

Step back for a moment and glimpse the weight rollercoaster I’ve been riding since I was a teenager. This chart plots out my weight by year, starting my freshman year of high school (1991). Yikes.

You’ll notice the overall trend upward, with huge dips when I joined Weight Watchers (1992), became a vegan (2000), followed the South Beach Diet before kid #1 (2006), started a weight-loss blog with my husband (2008) before having kid #2, and most recently began following a whole-foods, plant-based diet in late 2011.

Hobbling along the road to recovery

With my back in such bad shape last fall, I started seeing a new chiropractor (my third, who turned out to be, indeed, a charm!) He got me to a point where I could at least function, with a tolerable amount of pain. Then he sent me down the hall to physical therapy. Over the course of about eight weeks, I spent a few hours there each week, strengthening my badly neglected, flabulous body — particularly my core to help support my back. I got stronger, had a few chiro adjustments along the way, and “graduated” from PT. My back still felt fragile, but still better than since I’d given birth to James in 2009.

I finally decided to step on the scale and see how heavy I’d gotten. 250. Ouch. No wonder my back hurt so badly! All that excess weight was killing me.

Plants: They’re what’s for dinner (and lunch, and breakfast)

Enter my dear friend Karen, who’d been bugging me for months to watch some movie on Netflix called Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead. I had resisted watching it, because, really, who wants to watch a movie with that title when you are, indeed, quite fat and sick (if not “nearly dead”)? Now I was ready. I watched it, and dang if that documentary didn’t get me thinking — maybe all the processed crap and animal products I’ve been stuffing in my piehole could actually be harmful to me.

Then I figured I’d better read the book Karen had also been nagging me to read (do you see a pattern here? Karen is the most loving, persistent person I know) called Eat to Live by Dr. Joel Fuhrman. It’s chock-full of facts and scientific data, with the takeaway that eating plants will help you achieve a healthy weight and live a long, healthy life.

Sounded good to me. Hard, but the smart thing to do, and I went for it.

I started spending almost my entire grocery trip in the produce section. I bought kale, collard greens, mustard greens, spinach, eggplant, zucchini, tomatoes, carrots, berries of every kind, pomegranates, melon, apples, oranges, raw nuts and seeds, cashew butter, tons of soy milk, tons of spices (making up for elimination of salt) … oh, the list could go on and on. I think in the first month of “eating to live,” I consumed more fruits and vegetables than I have in the last 10 years put together.

No more fast-food as family staple. No more Coke Zero or pots of coffee to get me through the day. As I detoxed my system, I became a crazy plant-eating lady, scanning labels for “organic” and “whole grain” and realizing that just about every damn processed food has too much sodium and sugar in it.

A family affair

My family was not happy about this. Hubs just about threw down at those first few meals, which lacked anything “edible,” in his opinion. (To be fair, I’m not the world’s best cook, and preparing healthy, plant-based meals is a challenge for me. But I’m getting better.) My 2-year-old was addicted to Pop-Tarts and freaked out when I said “No more, Pop-Pop, buddy — how about a nice banana instead?” My 5-year-old proclaimed every meal “disgusting” and wanted to know where all the meat went.

Stressful as the transition was, I stuck to my guns. We were going to eat plants, like it or not. And if Hubs wanted to drive himself to Taco Bell for a bagful of junk, he could do that. He’s an adult and makes his own choices about how to treat his body. But our kids? I never felt more strongly that I had to teach them how (and why) to eat healthy and fuel their growing bodies and brains with the best nutrition possible.

Movin’ and groovin’

Meantime, upon graduation from physical therapy, I reacquainted myself with my gym and personal trainer. We continued building my core strength up, while working the rest of my muscles and burning up some calories with good ol’ cardio. I even tried Zumba (another recommendation from Karen) and discovered I actually liked it. Who knew?

Visual proof of progress in just 3 months

It’s now been about three months since I started eating plants and exercising regularly. I’ve lost 30 lbs, decreased my body fat by 3%, and dropped 18 inches overall. I went to my annual physical and the doctor declared my bloodwork”perfect.”

So far, so good

I’m proud of how I’m treating my body now. I have a lot more weight to lose (probably around 90 lbs to go), but I’m confident I can maintain this lifestyle because I believe in it. I watched a couple of other documentaries that helped solidify my passion for plants: Forks Over Knives and Food, Inc. Watch them both (they’re available for streaming on Netflix) and I promise you will think differently about how you eat.

And my kids! Wow, they’ve really come around. They like fruits and vegetables. James eats dates for a snack! Cassie prefers raspberries for dessert! I pack their lunches each day with love and excellent nutrition. I involve them in the grocery shopping, meal planning, and cooking (more Cassie than James, since he’s just 2).

Maybe, just maybe, in 30 years their weight charts won’t look the rollercoaster mine has become. I have high hopes they’ll develop healthy eating habits for life and avoid the pain and suffering of obesity, heart disease, cancer and other diseases that plague so many Americans.

Don’t worry — I’ll keep you posted as I make progress. This is just the first of what I hope to be many posts about my health journey. Along with all that other stuff working moms have going on. Whew!

The Drugstore = My Beauty Shop

Sara — Mon, 30 Jan 2012 20:04:35 +0000

Before I had kids, I was a department store/pro salon junkie. All of my beauty products were brand name, expensive and procured at places that were literally miles from anyplace you could also buy milk or aspirin or cat food. Children not only put a crimp in my budget for beauty supplies, they also took the leisure time that I used to spend going to Macy’s for moisturizer or Aveda for balm to treat my hair frizzies.

These days I’m a drugstore mom, with the vast majority of my beauty supplies picked up when I grab greeting cards or Children’s Tylenol. If I can’t make it to Macy’s on a regular basis, then I have to buy my beauty stuff when I’m buying my groceries, and I’ve got it down to a fine science with certain products I swear by. I thought I’d share them with you, and see if you can recommend some, too. (Disclaimer: while I have done work for a couple of these brands, none of them have given me any product or money in exchange for a mention. The only way my work could have swayed my opinion would be by exposing me to these products in the first place – but if they don’t work and I don’t love them, I’m not recommending them. So there!)

#1 Drugstore Beauty Product I Can’t Live Without: Olay Complete Moisturizer with SPF 15. I used to swear by Clinique moisturizer, but now I swear by Olay. I live in this stuff because it works and because I know it’s protecting me from the aging, damaging sun. For a richer moisturizer, I LOVE Regenerist Microsculpting Cream, but at the mid- to upper-$20s price point it’s about as expensive as I care to get with a face product. Often, I’ll use the Microsculpting Cream at night, then the Olay Complete for day.
#2 Drugstore Beauty Product I Can’t Live Without: Sonia Kashuk Hidden Agenda Eye Area Concealer Pallette. Being a working mom has given me dark circles and all sorts of other unsightly blemishes around my eyes, and this pallette is the best I’ve found for making me look like I didn’t get up 5 times in the night with a crying toddler. Get it at Target, along with a Sonia Kashuk concealer brush. My only complaint is that I use some of the colors quicker than others. I’d love if I could buy replacements one color at a time.

#3 Drugstore Beauty Product I Can’t Live Without: Maybelline Instant Age Rewind Radiant Firming Makeup and Protector Finishing Powder. Let’s face it, I’m not getting any younger. The goji berry and caffeine in these products seems to perk me up a bit while doing what a concealer and powder should. I also am a fan of the Cover Girl Clean line – it’s nice and light and blends easily into my skin.

#4 Drugstore Beauty Product I Can’t Live Without: Clairol Nice & Easy Root Touch-Up. Remember when I said I wasn’t getting younger? The grays have begun their invasion and my budget for salon trips can’t quite keep up. So I make my hair color last a little longer by doing up the roots with this easy-to-use system. It blends nicely with the salon color and, at about $6 a pop, it saves me money until I’m ready to go back to see a professional.

#5 Drugstore Beauty Product I Can’t Live Without: Biosilk Silk Therapy. This stuff is so awesome if you’re like me and your hair gets these annoying flyaways or split ends. Just a tiny bit smooths everything down and makes my hair look healthy and moisturized without being greasy.

#6 Drugstore Beauty Product I Can’t Live Without: Oral-B Professional Care Smart Series 5000 electric toothbrush or Cross Action Manual brush. This is one situation where I did get a free sample, a couple of years ago during a job, and I’ve been a believer ever since. Neither my husband nor I has a job with dental insurance, so taking care of our teeth is a big priority. I don’t think I’ve had a cavity since I started using my Smart Series 5000 electric brush, and when I can’t use it, the Cross Action is an awesome substitute. The Cross Action is probably the best toothbrush I’ve ever used.

Now, how about you? Do you have drugstore beaut products you swear by? Tell me about them!

Help Me Feed My Family (Without Pulling Out My Hair)!

Sara — Tue, 10 Jan 2012 19:08:31 +0000

While most people were out celebrating New Year’s Eve, I was having a mini-meltdown. We’d had a wonderful Christmas and then… something about the coming new year just filled me with dread. After having a good cry and discussing it with my husband, I narrowed the reason down to the fact that the first few months of every year are Very Very Hard for me. That’s because my husband’s a tax accountant, and it doesn’t take long for those long Busy Season hours to kick in. Starting early February I’m virtually a single mom, responsible for getting kids ready and to school every day, doing my own work, picking them up from school, cooking dinner, supervising homework, music lessons, etc., then getting them to bed. My husband comes home to help when he can, but the majority of parenting responsibilities fall to me. And weekends don’t offer much respite, especially mid-March to mid-April.

We strategized a bit about how to make this year less stressful, and one obvious idea bubbled to the top. It’s something I’ve been meaning to do for years now, and this year it might just be a key to my sanity.

I want to assemble the week’s meals on Sunday, then freeze them so all I have to do each night is turn on the oven and maybe steam some frozen veggies as a side. I’m thinking I’ll do a bunch of casseroles, lasagne, soups, etc. But my repertoire is pretty limited. That’s where I’m hoping my fellow working moms can help. PLEASE post links to quick and easy casseroles and other dishes that can be frozen, then re-heated. I’m open to crock pot recipes, too, but they have to be things that are FAST and simple to assemble in the morning.

So what do you say? Can you help me? My hungry kids and I will thank you – plus, if I love your dish, I just might pimp it here at WMAG. Thank you, fellow working moms. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

The Year of Not Sweating the Small Stuff

Becky — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 16:25:28 +0000

Hey all! Ok. I have been slacking on the posts. So I thought it was time to jump back in and get things going again!

Through the holidays and into the new year, I made a commitment to myself for 2012. This will be the year to not sweat the small stuff. Because, in reality, does all that little stuff really matter? Does it matter if the clothes are folded wrong or dinner is on a little late? Does the email really need sent to express your opinion just to express it? Do the kids really have to have a spotless room every waking moment?

Holidays tend to bring out tensions in a lot of families and so many of us take things personally and lash back. But this year, I choose not to. I choose to move past it and focus on the things that really matter – love we have for others and love we freely receive back. Sometimes it is hard to remember that those little things really aren’t important in the big picture when you are caught up in the midst of what is going on, but those little things cause tensions that add stress to your life and make shuffling all the things going on even tougher to do.

Over the past week, I have spent some quiet time reflecting on what the little things are that I tend to do that really aren’t necessary and cause extra tensions. Knowing what they are make it easier to focus on not doing them – or at least doing it less! So here are some of the little things I am going to work on eliminating this year:

Sending emails that don’t contribute to a solution
Making comments that will only result in hurting someone in some way
Reacting too quickly to others’ opinions
Going too long without complimenting someone
Being too picky on things that only matter to me and not to the grand scheme of things

Are there things you could be focusing less on in your life that could make things a little easier? After all, isn’t the best thing in the world the smile on your children’s face when they are happy?

Holiday Helpers: Shop Local!

Becky — Sun, 04 Dec 2011 14:45:35 +0000

I have been following along with a neat program put on by Yelp!. They have been doing a Golden Ticket Hunt to encourage people to shop local and look for a golden ticket to win prizes. That reminded me to share some great places for shopping local.

Cincinnati Area

Check out Family Friendly Cincinnati - They have compiled this great Family Friendly Cincinnati Shop Local Guide PDF that includes special offers for people that use it.
Over the Rhine Gateway – There are some nice places to shop in OTR and they have assembled a great guide to check out as well!
CincyFavorites – And if you want to share a taste of Cincinnati with family and friends in other areas, be sure to check out this site to send some of your favorite food from the area to others!

National Resources

Etsy - Don’t forget about all the home-made items that can be found on Etsy! There are some beautiful items available here – especially if you are looking for something unique for someone!
eBay - You can always check out eBay for the small businesses and individual people that are selling here to help boost the economy through these areas!

Also, don’t forget about all of your favorite consultants you have used for Avon, Tastefully Simple, Pampered Chef, Thirty-One, Tupperware and more. Most of the people selling these products are working moms like you trying to make a little extra money for their family. There are many great gift options and out there right now - and you will be helping other moms buy Christmas for their children!

The Moral: Make the Call

Becky — Mon, 28 Nov 2011 12:41:57 +0000

The kids were really bummed that no one back home (Wapakoneta) was doing Thanksgiving this year. That meant, they wouldn’t have one. So, I volunteered to cook for them. I invited my niece over and my sister – though my sister made tons of excuses and I wasn’t expecting her. Then, the day before, when I was preparing to go grocery shopping, I thought I should call her and check so I had a head count to know how much to buy.

While sitting there, I decided I should be the bigger person and invite my mom down, thinking she wouldn’t drive all this way. My mom and I haven’t been on the best terms for years now. But, I called her and invited her and she actually said she would drive down. Then, I felt like I better invite my brother because I didn’t want him to think I invited everyone but him. He has not been to my house the 5 years I have lived down here so I didn’t think he would come. Well, he decided to come.

So then I call my sister to let her know they were coming and she decided to come! LOL I was like “Oh lawd! This $100 meal just turned into a $400 meal!” LOL Then, I find out that my brother’s daughter was coming with them and my other brother’s daughter (the brother that passed away) was coming, too! Yowsa! THE WHOLE FAMILY WAS COMING!

Then, I realized I don’t even have enough seats to sit that many people! hahahaha So off I went to the store to buy groceries, a couple of card tables and some folding chairs. $439 later – I had everything bought. Gah! But I did end up getting a pretty nice meal together.

So – even though mom and I have not been on the best terms, I reached out for my kids and it turned into a great Thanksgiving that would not have happened if I hadn’t made the phone call. Kids were so happy and I was pleased to have everyone come and enjoy the day.

Now – left-overs for a week! hahahaha Hope everyone else had a great holiday!

Holiday Helpers: Get Better Online Deals

Becky — Sat, 26 Nov 2011 15:27:34 +0000

Last week, I posted about shopping online. Many of you have had great online shopping experiences! This week, I thought I would share some complimentary sites that will help you get a better deal. So check these out:

Freeshippingonline.org – Shipping can sometimes cost you more than the item you want to buy alone. When planning your purchases, be sure to stop here first! This site notes discounts on shipping and free shipping that online stores have to offer. If you really want to save on shipping, Free Shipping Day this year is Dec. 16.

ebates.com – As long as you are going to shop online, why not earn more in the process? This site keeps track of rebates available and offers a chance to earn bonuses if you refer friends that purchase $25 or more after signing up from your referral.

Retail Me Not – I love this site! No matter what I purchase online, I always stop here first to see if there are any discounts or coupons available. Each promo code let’s you know if they have been successful when others have used them so you don’t waste your time on phony coupons.

The Cyber Monday – The Monday after Thanksgiving is always the “Black Friday” for online shopping. Cyber Monday deals can be easily found by stopping by this site first!

Google Product Search – Can’t find what you are looking for? This handy tool allows you to search quickly for where you can find these products to buy online.

Holiday Helpers: Online Shopping

Becky — Fri, 18 Nov 2011 18:26:06 +0000

I admit. I have always been a last minute holiday shopper. Last year, on Dec. 12, I broke my ankle. Immediately, my first worry (past getting home and my leg up) was “how in the world will I buy Christmas”. I hadn’t even begun shopping and here I was bed-ridden for at least 6 weeks. So, I set out to do all of my Christmas shopping online.

I also admit – I had been skeptical of shopping online for Christmas. ”What if they don’t arrive in time?” and “What if it isn’t what I thought it was when it gets here?” were a couple of my normal worries. Let me tell you – I have never been more pleased before about shopping when I was done! I couldn’t believe how easy and stress-free it was nor that it all arrived quickly and was exactly what I thought it would be!

So, knowing Black Friday is right around the corner and that the holidays are fast approaching, I thought I would start to share with you great places to shop online each week between now and Christmas!

One quick tip to keep in mind! If you have kids that are allowed to use the internet to put together their wishlist, life is a million times easier when they forward your list with links included to what they want! But even better! Why not use easy tools like online wish lists to help? Amazon Wish List is fabulous for this!

So here are five great places to check out online:

Zappos – This place is fabulous! The last place I ordered from, yet the first order to arrive on my door step. Their customer service is awesome and the experience was better than any local store could have provided!
Amazon – What doesn’t this place have? Easy to use, quick delivery and a large variety to choose from!
Sephora – If you know someone that uses their products, Sephora offers great deals around Christmas and arrives as expected. They offer great gift wrapping options as well as free shipping on orders over $50.
Toys R Us – Everything arrived as expected. Be careful not to wait too late for the hot toys of the year, as the website runs out quickly like the stores do. They offer a Wish List feature that would be great for kids!
ThinkGeek – For the Geek in your life, you can’t get any better than this site! Unique items that are priced well and would make any true Geek completely happy!

Where have you ordered from online? Feel free to share your favorite online locations to shop and why!

One Way or Another, You’re Going to Take Care of Yourself

Sara — Thu, 17 Nov 2011 19:31:18 +0000

I’ve never been a big fan of people reminding me to “take time for yourself.” As a writer, I’ve done my share of articles urging mothers to find time for relaxation and self-care. It’s good advice, sure, but personally it’s rubbed me the wrong way, mostly because it always felt like another item on the to-do list. “Really?” I wanted to say. “I should be taking care of myself? As if I didn’t know that. And if I had time to take time for me, then I would be doing it!”

Yeah. My attitude has not always been the best. (And hey look, this week WMAG is also featuring the Living Self Care Challenge – what a timely post!)

But something happened this year that forced me to change my thinking.

Rewind to last Christmas. I’d had a tough year. Work was demanding, my husband’s career took him away a lot so I was basically a single parent much of the time, and I had a toddler and a grade schooler to keep up with. We took a massive road trip for the holidays to visit our families, and I remember loading up the rented SUV feeling run-down mentally and ill physically. I had literally run myself ragged. But I kept on going. The entire holiday was a mind-buzzing blur. Looking back I swear I had the flu, but I never once let myself slow down.

In January, I went in for an annual exam. A few days later my doctor called and said the tests had come back abnormal. (I’m going to be vague here, but most female readers will know what I’m talking about.) This is something I dealt with in my 20s, then things cleared up and I hadn’t had any problems for years and years. The abnormalities are caused by a virus that sits dormant, waiting for your immune system to go down so it can move in and start messing things up. And if ever there was a time when my immune system was down, it was the months leading up to that test.

I don’t want to be too melodramatic, because nobody told me my life was in imminent danger, but this is the kind of problem that can turn deadly if you don’t catch it in time. In fact, one of my high school friends has been told she is terminal with the same thing. And when you’re a mom, the slightest risk that something could take you away from your kids is absolutely terrifying. I’d been so busy taking care of them that I hadn’t considered there might come a time when I *couldn’t* be there for them. One way to fight this thing (in addition to a couple of unpleasant medical procedures) was to slow down and stop running myself into the ground.

That’s what I did – I didn’t have a choice. It wasn’t about pampering myself or indulging in things like spa treatments, it was about getting to bed at a decent time, eating better, recognizing when my stress levels are getting too high, taking time to exercise when I can–basically making sure I stay as healthy as possible. All of my follow-up tests have come back normal, and I’m hopeful I can keep it that way. Like it or not, taking time for myself *has* to be an item on my to-do list. It’s not an empty luxury, it’s an absolute necessity.

Gear Up for the Holidays with a Week of Self-Care

Susan — Mon, 14 Nov 2011 18:55:04 +0000

Working moms have to be especially vigilant about taking care of themselves as we approach “the most wonderful time of the year” (aka “the most stressful time of the year” for many of us). It’s too easy to neglect ourselves in favor of lengthy to-do lists and constant demands from all directions.

That’s why we’re supporting this week’s Living Self-Care Challenge as a “Challenge Champion.”

Today through Friday, the challenge focuses on how we can take good care of ourselves and beat holiday stress.

Here’s how you can participate:

Visit the Living Self-Care website or sign up for their emails. Each day this week, a new self-care challenge will be offered up. You can contribute to the conversation via Twitter (#listof3) and/or Facebook.
Join #ppdchat tonight at 8:30pm EST to discuss “Self-Care, Gratitude, and Easing Holiday Stress.”
Listen to this podcast about “Living the Self-Care Challenge” hosted by Mamas on Bedrest and Dr. Diane Sanford, Author of Life Will Never Be the Same: The Real Mom’s Post Partum Guide
Enter for a chance to win a whole bunch of sweet prizes by visiting the “Challenge Champion” websites and leaving a comment on Living Self-Care.

Let’s be good to us, so we can be good to the people we love.