Sorry my kid peed in your store last night. The one at Kenwood Towne Centre in Cincinnati, Ohio, that is.
You see, she’s not quite 3 yet and still in her first few months of potty-trained life. While her bladder is quite capable of holding large amounts of pee, sometimes when she’s out and about and going to a bathroom seems so inconvenient, she just lets go. No warning. Just a growing puddle of urine on the hardwood floor in the cute little girl dollhouse and bed set section of Pottery Barn Kids.
I know, I know — I should’ve immediately alerted the store’s staff of our “mishap” and offered to clean it up. That would have been the responsible thing to do. But instead, like a coward, I fled with my pee-soaked kid in tow (a half-eaten cookie still in her hand). We ducked out the entrance where no staff people were at the time. Oh, the shame.
I’m sure it didn’t take you long to discover what we had done. Maybe you thought it was apple juice? Or maybe you knew exactly what it was, and who had done it, and you’re sending us a bill for the clean-up job right now? We deserve it.
One thing I can promise you: We won’t set foot in your store again — at least, not until the kiddo is old enough to hold it for sure. In the meantime, we’ll have to settle for quietly perusing your website
and, when at the mall, walking quickly past your store like we’ve never seen it before in our lives
Yours truly remorseful,