This will be my fifth(!) holiday season as a mom, so you’d think I might have cracked the code on how to enjoy the holidays and not feel guilty because of things I should be doing but alas, am not. Nope, haven’t managed to achieve that nirvana-esque level of holiday bliss.
I have, however, managed to pass on my holiday anxiety to my 4 1/2 year old, who lately has been telling me how she’s “worried she won’t be able to get everything done for Christmas.” I asked her, “What do you need to get done?” and she answered, “I have a lot of places to go and things to do.”
Huh? I remember how wonderful it was to be a carefree kid during the holidays, not feeling a bit of expectation to send cards, buy and wrap gifts, cook anything or go anywhere. I just ate cookies, opened presents and watched claymation Christmas specials to my little heart’s content.
Well, at least I figured out a way as a responsible grownup to send cards to family, friends and clients without a lot of time and expense. My Amazon Prime membership came in handy for hassle-free shopping. And we decorated right after Thanksgiving (mostly because of my anxious daughter’s strong insistence), so unlike in previous years, I won’t be hanging ornaments while guests are heading over for Christmas dinner.
But I still don’t feel like I’m doing enough. I should be hauling my kids to more holiday tradition-type things around town. I should have festive outfits to wear for family gatherings. I should be baking gingerbread cookies from scratch for people who are good to me all year long. Should should should … blergh!
Maybe I need to re-read some of the fantastic holiday posts over at the Living Self-Care blog. Those ladies (who also happen to be licensed therapists) know what’s UP. Don’t sweat it, mama, you’re doing just fine, they’d tell me. So I’ll do that, turn up the Colbert Christmas tunes, finish wrapping, convince Cassie that she has no places to go or things to do, and hopefully soak up all this “warmth of the season” I see hyped on TV.