What does mom do when she is sick? Or rather, what doesn’t she do to take care of herself?
For any mom, working or not, this is a real issue. We don’t just get to leave our jobs, take our kids with us to the Dr for hours, go to bed on time or for hours in the middle of the day, eat right, etc. As moms we are often the last to be taken care of.
I don’t know about you but my kids do not care if I am sick. If I were oozing blood they might be slightly grossed out, but would otherwise ignore it. Because they are kids. It is their job to ignore everything but themselves as they learn who they are in this world. Yes, it is important to teach compassion, but we can only expect so much out of little ones. Yeah yeah yeah. I know. We should be the first to take care of ourselves because no one else will. Great advice… now what’s reality?
Since my sweet twins have been born I have had very little time for self care and my body still has not recovered from back to back pregnancies, one with multiples. And this last round of being sick has really been a beating. Not because I’m that sick, but because the way my children need me right now is more physically demanding than it was before. Read: 95 lbs of kids want you to pick them up at the same time. So what do you do when no one but mommy will do for the kids? I went to my go-to place for mom advice and asked my mommy friends on Facebook what they do when they are sick.
Here’s what my Mommy Friends had to say:
- “TV. Lots of TV. Something I SWORE I would never do. You gotta do what you gotta do.”
- “I sat the Girls (they were 2 or 3 at the time) on the couch with a package of saltine crackers one evening then went to bed to wait for daddy to get home . . .”
- “When I was pregnant and sick I got him a snack, milk,and juice, turned on a movie and then hide under a blanket on the couch for a nap.”
- “I would get my mother to help me when I got sick. Mom knows best.”
- “I thought mommies were not allowed to get sick!! No one told me. I had a cardiac pacemaker implant and that night I was rocking my 11 month old to sleep because daddy said, ‘…the baby ONLY will sleep for you.’ “
- “Now she is old enough to give me an ice-pack for my head.”
From the WMAG Contributor crew:
- Sara “This is going to sound bad, but… I don’t let myself get sick. I mean, I do get sick, but I power through, which isn’t good for me or anybody. The biggest tip I can offer is to be honest with your husband/partner (if you have one) about needing time for yourself. I don’t do that enough, and then things build up and I get depressed and resentful and sick, and then I explode. I’m trying to be more “selfish” these days.”
- Susan “Personally, I’m not the poster child for great self-care. I know I should do it, and I know it’s important, but I’m kind of like you — I wait until things get pretty bad before I take serious action. A few things I pretty much insist on (for myself):7-8 hours a sleep MOST nights, annual OBGYN and dental checkups, time to myself on weekends (even if it’s while folding laundry — just to be alone and watch a TV show I love), take daily meds to control hypertension (which I’ve had since age 22), and regular pedicures. I think each woman has to decide what really matters to her health and self-care, and FIGHT to maintain it.” Read how Susan dealt with Life Under Quarantine
But my favorite piece of advice came from my Dr:
“Go home while your kids are at school. If you died tomorrow your job would have you replaced within a week.” Gee, thanks doc! But it’s true, isn’t it?
So what do I do? I let my husband know to expect that he needs to help me more, call mom if I REALLY need help (I try not to abuse it), do TV, but I also power through. Because that is what we have to do sometimes. And I don’t do the extras. Dinner is easy, dishes wait, laundry waits, and baths may not happen. And I make sure I see a doctor before it gets too bad because I have learned what ignoring signs of trouble can do. What do you do when you are sick?
Want more about caring for yourself? Check out our other posts about health and self-care:
You may also like
9 thoughts on “What Does Mom Do When She Is Sick?”
Leave a Reply
This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.
I always said when my kids were little “Moms just can’t get sick”. Unfortunately they do and if you’re lucky enough to have a husband that can pitch in and take off or family nearby that’s great..otherwise lots of advil
They really can’t, can they? Or at least not a non-debilitating illness. Give me a good surgery for a few days of rest, am I right? Just kidding! I’ve had 2 surgeries since the twins were born and that was some of the best rest. I told my husband I needed to figure out how to have surgery again this year so I can sleep for a day or 2.
Banging on the bedroom door. Oh yeah! It reminds of when I left my job because I wanted to be at home with my kids and I opened a photography studio in my home. boy did it sound ideal from afar to have a home based business with little kids when they keep banging on the doors you want to keep them out of
I think this one rings very true for all mommies, just like you said. Sometimes I hate that I can’t truly take care of myself when I’m sick, but at the very least I try to take a sick day from work if possible, if I am super sick, but still bring my boys to daycare…I feel so guilty for doing it, but it’s the only way to attempt to get some rest and feel better. I’m thankful to have that option…my sister is a SAHM to two little ones under the age of 2, a well as three step-children that are school age…and she has no family nearby…so it can be a real struggle for her.
When I asked my facebook friends what they did my heart kind of broke for some of them. I agree, as a working mom lots of things seem harder but if you are truly sick and need to take a day off work you can take your kids to daycare. My SAHM friends don’t have that option! And let’s face it, even if someone is there to help it doesn’t mean the kids will let you rest. They will bang on the bedroom door until you answer.
Your job will not replace you, there us no one else to replace you with! You (the author)are esentially important to your job!
So true! I never thought about what would happen when I got sick back when I daydreamed about being a mom. I totally call in sick at work and take the little one to day care. I dread getting sick on a weekend. It’s so true that my SAHM friends don’t get a break!
my mother is so demanding when she is sick and not feeling better and she asked me all the time to do this for her and that for her and I do and it is never enough and it drives me crazy and she gets mad and I can not take it anymore